Friday, December 14, 2007

It's a wonderful life

12/14/07 Friday
What a wonderful life. There are some advantages to losing everything you had, dying, being in a coma after they bring you back to life, wandering homeless, and losing your memory. What??? Are you nuts??? Nope, not at all. It changes how you see everything. All the money folks worry over and fear losing loses it’s value in comparison. If you go back in this journal you’ll find where I talk about seeing movies I know I have seen many times before but with no or only partial memories of them it’s like seeing it for the first time ever. Today the movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life” came on. Now I know I’ve seen this movie at least a half dozen times in my life but not since I woke from the coma in 2001. It was pretty much all new. All I can remember was him wanting to commit suicide off a bridge and the town coming to bail him out but nothing else. I didn’t remember why it all happened or nothing. So folks I just got to see the movie as if for the very first time. Can you remember when you first saw it? Can you remember how it touched you? I’m sure it no longer has the impact it did that first time. I cried. But that’s part of the emotional control loss I have. I cry and get upset easier than I’d like. Kind of like being a child in that respect. But that is good. Being like a child, being simpler, not being as hard or as jaded, that is good. What a great movie this is. It spells out things so well, the sacrificial good versus uncompassionate greed. Doing what is best for the other versus best for you. That is the definition of the Greek word translated as Love in the bible. To choose for the highest good of the other over yourself. I’ll need to see the movie several times again before it sinks in and stays. That’s the other advantage of short term memory loss, I can see the same movie a few times for the first time. Some parts I’ll remember but I’ll still get surprised. That’s fun.

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