Tuesday, December 20, 2005

12/18/05 Sunday
Got up and this journal was again corrupted. Don’t know what is going on. Perhaps it’s because I always have the journal open when I go online. Probably should close it. It is already 1:25 today and we both have barely gotten ready for the day. Cherie dyed her hair and is way ahead of me. Allen called and I will head over there. Tried to call Eileen but got no answer so I am sure they are busy with all the things that go with deaths in the family. Not real speedy this morning, in fact was only running at a five but have moved up to a six. Cooked a bunch of oatmeal cookies this morning.

12/19/05 Monday
Didn’t get much written yesterday. I know I went to Allen’s. We more or less got a long as he is learning how not to aggravate me. I got him to not play his TV and stereo real loud where we could hold a conversation. It’s not the fact that we have to yell as much as it is my ability to keep a train of thought with distractions around. Allen has been slowly baring his soul, talking about various past experiences and family. How he feels powerless to help when he is so far from Maryland, what has kept him from suicide. He did get upset when I said he was a “junky”. That brought it out and as he told me why he was not even close to being a junkie I told him he was in denial, which is common for every addiction. Then I asked him “Allen, this is sucking you dry. How much money do you spend?”. “That’s different, I need to get this for my pain. I don’t take it to get high” was his reply. I pointed out that he couldn’t go on like this and needed to find medical help with the hope of a permanent solution.

This will be a busy day. I am running a seven which is a good start. Wayne needs to get to the bank and I will take Barb to Trilby Church for a Christmas basket. I still would like to visit Eileen and hope that works out.
Christmas – the time of the year when all the pains in the ass pucker up to blow you a kiss. Brings out a new meaning of the term asshole. The yearly insanity is on us. I can’t even go into a grocery store without someone trying to run me over with their shopping cart.

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