Friday, September 19, 2008

Helping say goodbye

9/17/08 Wednesday
It’s been real busy and today will be no different. Need to go work for the old guy this morning but the dogs need to be at the vet by 11:30.

9/18/08 Thursday
Sorry I haven’t been writing. Have been busy, busy, for days now. Mowing has been a big part of that but I’ve been helping two people let go of memories. Both of them have lost a loved one. One lost his son after the son’s thirty of forty years of fighting one of those debilitating diseases that leave you unable to walk or do much at all. As I cleaned and organized a building for this person I pulled together all the wheelchairs and wheel chair parts. Once it was all in one placed I looked at it and realized…This is a memorial, just a faint glimpse into a lifetime with a disability that robbed so much. I see all the worn out wheel chairs, including three powered ones, and the broken and worn parts in boxes. These are like old cars driven till they won’t drive anymore and replaced. How hard this was, hard to be the son but equally hard on the father who obviously cared so deeply. There is a sadness in the old man’s soul. The kind of sadness that comes with a lifetime of watching your child face the effects of this implacable disease for thirty of forty years. I never asked him about it so don’t really know how long it was but somewhere in that range.

The other person is a widow Cherie and I know. Her husband died a year or five ago. Again I didn’t feel comfortable asking about it but she has a house full of memories that have turned into clutter. So many things that were gathered over the decades of a long marriage but now it’s time to clean up. She would pick up something and tell me the story connected to it and then make a decision whether or not to keep it. Each decision came with pain and a little guilt as she felt giving something up was a violation of some type. I was there to help and began to see my job as helping her say goodbye and encouraging her to let go of these items. I’ll be helping her several days over the next few weeks and will take much of the stuff to Goodwill and Habitat for Humanity so it will help someone else. This sombrero was included so I gave it to Miracle. You regular readers know who Miracle is as I’ve written about her and her family. Just type “Miracle” into the search engine at the top and it will take you there.

Weeds growing around and through some fencing sections I was unable to put up

As usual when I haven’t written for a while it’s the pictures that remind me of where I’ve been and what’s been going on. Lots of stuff still gets lost in this mind but that’s ok. I’ve been bustin my butt to catch up on the weeds and garden but it doesn’t seem like I’ve done much at all. Working for the old guy and helping our other friend cut into my time here at the farm but helping others is my heart and what gives value to life so I don’t regret it at all.

So I’ve been mowing and mowing. I’m only about halfway through despite being on it for a week and the weeds keep growing so it’s getting hard for the mower to handle. I’ll get on it again this morning while it’s still cool out. The temperatures are cooling down, a sign that winter is on its way.

This brings up another problem I must deal with. We still haven’t repaired the hole in the wall from the fire we had last winter. I’ve gotten materials and ordered the final piece I need for the chimney but just don’t have the ability or know how to finish the job. I can’t remember if someone was going to help or not, I just know it’s not done and winter is on the way. Because we don’t have a furnace and heat the house with the woodstove getting this done is vital. I just can’t do it by myself. On top of that rain and sand are getting into the wall and this can cause some permanent damage. Till I can get it fixed we’ll just put extra blankets on the bed on the cold nights. At least I have lots of wood already cut for this winter. Hopefully there is enough.

I picked up this tank at the landfill. I had been hoping to get a roll of fencing but it was gone. I sure needed it but there was no way I could lift it by myself. We’ve noticed the difference in how well the plants do when it rains versus using the well water. It’s a dramatic one. I’ve always wanted to “harvest” rainwater but having a tank or cistern to hold it is a vital part of that. It’s my hope that I can repair the damage and use this for that purpose.

We also bought a 10’x 10’ foot kennel. This is to keep the outside dogs contained at night and provide protection from the coyotes. I also hope it will reduce the damage they are wreaking on the garden, mostly in the melon patches. I’ve lost hundreds of dollars now because they break open every melon when it’s starting to get ripe. Take thirty or forty watermelons that I can sell for seven bucks apiece and it adds up pretty quick. Building fences is becoming a badly needed thing but once again it’s not something I can do by myself. I was going to ask our Sunday school friends for help when they approached us to see what we needed most. That can be a long list.Click to enlarge, lots of broken melons here and it's just part of five melon patches

Now that Cherie has a full time job I’ll be losing my disability check. It won’t hurt too much as Cherie will bring home more than the check was but I think the VA will start charging me for medicine and stuff. I’m not sure but it’s likely. It’s been my goal to get off disability anyway.

There is so much to do that I don’t have time to write anymore so got to go.


Amy E said...

Wow, good news that Cherie has a full time job, but I thought you received a disability check because you were considered at least partially disabled. I always thought it was a military disability you were receiving.

I'll be praying you get some answers regarding that and your medical needs.

Hang in there with the farm work and such. Don't feel too bad, we don't get all of our stuff done either. We just take it one day at a time, and work on the most pressing.

Hope you are enjoying your cooler weather, we sure are!

Bob said...

Hi Amy, Yes I am disabled but the way the VA disability works is the same as SSI and Social Security. (SSI is a type of Social Security) The payments are to help those who are too poor to live without. And the government insists you stay poor. You are not allowed to have a car that is worth too much or have much money in the bank. If you do you must either sell the car or get rid of the money. My friend, Wayne, got a $25,000 check after I fought Social Security for three years to get him recognized as disabled. (here he was with MS and unable to walk without a walker) Then they told him he had too much money in the bank and gave him till the end of the year to spend it. Cherie's income is enough to disqualify me. If she lost her job I can get reinstated.