Tuesday, December 16, 2008

With Christmas comes emotion

12/16/08 Tuesday
As Christmas draws closer so do all the emotions that come attached to it. There are good times and sad times I am sure but I can only remember a few, and those dimly. But what comes home at this time of the year is the estrangement from my dad, who has refused to talk with me after the one conversation we had two years after I woke from the coma. That one didn’t go well but I was still a mess from the brain injury so probably didn’t choose my words well. Who knows what stories he’s been told. Actually I know some of the stories my ex told him, stories that justified her actions and that of course put me in as bad a light as possible. What I also know is some of the stories my brother was spreading up here with my relatives on my grandmother’s side. He was vigorous and malicious as he did his best to insure everyone knew I was a drug addict and not in my right mind. Hell, he even told that to the manager of the nursing home Minnie Lee was at till she died. We had to overcome that just to gain access and visit my grandmother. How I want to tell my dad the truth and clear up these lies. But mostly I just to talk with him, get along with him, and help him get over the bitterness that is in his soul. We are sending a card and gift but are unsure if he will even open a letter or package that comes from me. My brother told me that dad instructed him to not talk to me at all. Whether he did or not I can’t say for my brother’s words have proved to be not very true. If they are then I can safely assume that dad gave my sister the same instructions. My request for when dad’s birthday is has gone unanswered.

Cherie had a job interview yesterday and it went very well. She’s excited and I hope she gets the job. She said it was the most unusual job interview she has ever had and they talked about all kinds of things. She interviewed with one of the owners of the business and in the process told her about how Cherie and I got back together after my accident. The lady and her husband had been in a bad car wreck last year and he might have sustained a traumatic brain injury cause she said that he was different afterwards.

That’s all I’m going to write for now. I don’t know what’s going on with this body but the headaches have been coming often along with fatigue. I went to bed early last night because of a headache. Now I’m tired this morning despite having just woken up two hours ago and my eyes are again sensitive to the light. That is often a precursor of a headache.
What a headache that was. I lost a whole day but it wasn’t only because of the headache. Walking has been difficult and I had more than one slow down. Cherie had a really bad headache last night as well. I am wondering if our woodstove might be leaking fumes into the house. It is in no way an airtight wood burner so the possibility exists. My ex in Michigan said I could get the woodstove that’s in what is now her house. It is a sweet airtight unit with built in fan and other stuff. We bought it when we bought the house. Too bad it’s fifteen hundred miles away and weighs a ton. Oh well.

Cherie is house sitting for Janie the next three days so it’s lonely nights for me. That’s ok, we need the money and love having a chance to help them out. It’s nine o’clock now. I’m tired but I’ve been tired all day. Think I’ll try to get some sleep.

No comments: