Wednesday, September 01, 2010

Hard hearts

Last nights sunset

9/1/10 Wednesday
We got a light sprinkle of rain last night. I’ll take anything we get with gratitude. First thing this morning is to get on the tractor and disc it under with the thought that this will keep most of it from evaporating away. Then it’s time to sow the poppy seeds that Tana gave us. These are the kind of poppies that the VFW used to give away in response to donations. They are a bright red flower and from what I read are self seeding so will make a good cover crop that renews itself. Been looking for an opportunity to get them established. Not sure if there’s enough moisture in the soil to germinate them but there’s a chance for rain in a couple of days and I don’t think the birds and ants will disappear all the seeds before then.

At some point I need to take my backpack sprayer apart and see if I can fix it. Need to use it to spray herbicide on the weeds that are choking out the hundreds of dollars worth of Burmuda hay seed I sowed. I know I’m trying to be organic but this hay needs to get established and once it does should remain as a permanent part of the field I put it in. Nothing is easy and I just don’t have what it takes to hoe by hand two full acres of land. I paid fifty or so bucks for this sprayer and bought the more expensive “Stanley” brand name with the thought that it would last more than a year.
Recently planted rows

Cherie has been stressed lately. The deep hurt of those we called friends and were not still lingers. They don’t seem to comprehend at all just how deep they cut us, evidently too wrapped up in themselves and their sense of righteousness to believe they have done anything that bad. There was a quick “Forgive us” blanket request that I suppose, in whatever theology they follow, is a cure all for all wrongs done. It’s not that easy. With God, for me to be forgiven, I must acknowledge the wrong I’ve done and God also requires that I repent of it. These people have since cut off communication with us and while it has been stated that they would choose a third party to sit down and mediate a discussion to “Resolve” this rift I must wait and see. I told him something to the effect of “If it’s important to you” regarding that. What people say means nothing, it’s what they do or don’t do that clearly shows what is important to them and what is not. I think they are more worried about their personal reputation than about what is right. I might be wrong but all I know is what I see.

Part of the issue evidently is that some of the scriptures and thoughts on the bible’s teachings I have posted they interpret as direct attacks on them. In some cases this situation did elicit what I posted but not in all of them. And the intent was not to use the bible as a tool to attack but I study the scriptures seeking to understand what it says about people and their actions and I write about what’s on my mind, as I’m doing now. If not keeping up with the work bothers me I write about it, if peoples’ actions upset me I write about it, when God blesses us, I write about it. I’ve known some preachers who were accused every time the preached a sermon of attacking some member of their congregation because the scriptures and sermons exactly fitted that members issues. This is the way of the bible. Hebrews 4:12 For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

All I can say is “Do not harden your heart”. If the shoe fits wear it and be responsible for what you do. We all mess up and no one likes it being pointed out to them. I might not like it but in my desire to ever improve and constantly work to be a better man I appreciate it when someone says “Hey, that’s not cool”. If someone truly cares they won’t let me continue being a fool. My bible tells me I’m to always seek to improve my brother and help him grow along with letting him know if he’s following a path that leads to destruction. I plan on doing a bible study on “Judgment” soon. Everyone loves to quote the “Don’t judge lest you be judged” scripture but few understand the whole picture on judgment in the bible. At one point Jesus says “Judge not” and then at another He admonishes to “Judge with a righteous judgment”. In everything there is a balance and when people pull out scriptures to fit their personal views they get out of balance. That gets back into the “God in a box” aspect of Christianity where people just create or gravitate to the description of God they like the most.

I’ve got a tractor to get on and the sun is up drying the ground so enough of this. There are some bible studies I’ll be doing soon that will be posted on my “Balaam’s ass” blog. Time to go.

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