Monday, June 05, 2006

Clear day

6/5/06 Monday
I think it will be a good day. I was hungry this morning, a sensation I seldom experience due to the brain injury. That is always a good sign. I am running a strong 8 on the Bob scale. My fingers are dancing on this keyboard. Hope this lasts all day. It is a bright cloudless day and the weatherman predicts that is the way it will stay all day long. I just went and picked up the two computers at Virtual PC’s.

When I came back I could see Fred through the front window going through everything that was at the mailboxes as he does. I was on the phone talking to Cherie on the phone. She has E mailed me a shopping list as I had asked her to do and wanted to make sure I got it. Fred waited at the door for me and when I came in it started. “Can you smell that? She sprayed something all up and down the hallway. I can smell that shit all in my place. Can you smell it?” he ranted as he pointed to Mia’s (The girls across the hall) door. “That bitch should have stayed in California”.

Richey, the guy down stairs, had come in right behind me. I looked at him as I sniffed the air. “Fred all I smell is food” I said and Richey followed with “It smells spicy. I’m getting hungry now”. That didn’t settle Fred down so he went on about how Mia always does this and it’s a shame that just when he is able to breath he has to smell this crap. “Fred, Mia’s not here. Her cars gone” I informed him to no avail. Richey shrugged, looking at me with half a grin on his face and made his escape. “It’s all in my apartment. Walk in there and smell it. Go on in” Fred instructed me. Jealous of Richey’s successful escape I went into Fred’s apartment. It didn’t smell at all like what was in the hall, it just smelled like old people. “Fred, you have a blanket blocking the bottom of the door. There’s no way that something from the hall will come in your apartment. Maybe it is from outside” I tried to convince him. Not going to work. I give up and tell Fred I have to get upstairs after confirming we will be taking Barb to the grocery store. Glad to be up here writing this journal entry.

I am sharp and it will be a good day for me but I suspect it may be a bit trying. Lou called to let me know that they too got the letter from LMHA stating that Wayne did not give them the required notice for him to move. I let Lou know that I would be personally going to LMHA to raise hell. I am glad the brain is working well as it forebodes to be an active day. I will take Fred and Barb shopping, then Wayne to cash his check and get food, and LMHA on top of that.

Fred stayed in the car while we shopped. As soon as I got in the car he started again “Did you smell that?”. I’m already not in a good mood, especially after fighting unsuccessfully to publish this post on Blogger. I told him “Fred I don’t know what’s wrong with your sniffer but all I can smell is some good cooking. You need to settle down on this”. It actually worked to my relief.

Now I am back home and still fighting to post on my blog. Don’t know what the issue is so I am running spy ware in case it’s on my side of things. Called Wayne so he will be waiting my arrival.

Evidently Blogger has some issues. When I looked at the blog there were four identical posts for today so each time I thought I failed and redid the posts they somehow all showed up hours later. Now I cannot get into it to edit out the extra posts.
OK, now there is a notice posted that they are doing maintenance on the system so that explains things.

Been trying to reach Jennine Hummel, Wayne’s LMHA caseworker but get the automated phone jungle that won’t even reach an operator. I’ll drop by there in person on the way to get Wayne.

4:09 – Just got back. There are times and circumstances that bring the old Bob back, the Bob I have tried to bury and let die with my old life. I have been generally successful at that but on rare occasions that demon raises it’s head from the grave. Today there was a glimpse of that old life. It started with the frustration over Wayne’s housing. I have little tolerance for bureaucratic bungling, especially when it hurts another. The other thing that sets me off is when someone walks over another for their personal benefit or just decides to hog his way through. You know, the guy who cuts in line or flies past a line of cars knowing the lane ahead is closed. When I see them coming I will move my car right in their way, forcing them to stop. They get mad, honk their horn, give me the finger, and I laugh. I really enjoy setting them down.

Today, when I took Wayne shopping we ran into that. At the grocery store there is a stop sign and pedestrian walk for the patrons to cross over to the parking lot. Wayne doesn’t move fast and has to hang on to his walker. I saw a car coming that wasn’t stopping for anyone, forcing people with their full shopping carts to stop short. OK, Meet Bob. I walked out in front of the guy and stopped, smiling as I looked him in the face. I stayed there as Wayne and others made it across and then moved. The driver said something as he drove by though it wasn’t loud enough for me to make out. This is when the demon came out. “F- You Dck head” I said as I gave him a double handed single finger salute. I kind of hoped he would stop the car and get out but he evidently wasn’t as dumb as he looked.

I am not happy about it now and usually am better at keeping this in check. It is hard because of the life I lived. I’ve been shot at and I’ve been stabbed. With the years in prison and the street life there is little I fear and few I can’t take down. However when those around, who had watched this guy practically run over the old people and mothers with their children, saw this they cheered and clapped. OK, now I feel bad and feel good at the same time, just a little conflicted. I’ll still work on being nice but I will always stick up for those who are being taken advantage of. The guy who roars around and intimidates those weaker and helpless will always get my attention. Smacking them down just feels right and good to me. I suppose I should get therapy or something.

Oh well, I digress. Back to the day. I stopped at LMHA and learned who I need to talk to. Then Wayne tells me his caseworker called and said there was nothing she could do. She told him I need to get a copy of the form they lost. Now how am I supposed to do that. I should of made a copy for my records and indeed have been doing that diligently with all his medical records and Social Security stuff. Of course when I don’t it comes back to bite me. Tomorrow I will go see Colleen, the lady I am told who is responsible for this. Hope I am a bit more gentle then. Fact is I am glad I didn’t see her today with the mood I am in. The brain injury makes control of emotions a problem. That’s not an excuse for my actions but a partial explanation. It is OK when I cry easily at a movie or television show but the anger thing is different story.

So you can tell it has been an eventful day. I hope you don’t mind my honesty regarding the anger and stuff but that is the way it will be. I won’t just tell all the good things about me and make it appear I am such a great guy. False fronts offend me so you won’t get one from me.

Yesterday was a decent day. I don’t remember all of it, just a few things. Cherie and I went downtown. We first stopped at the antique mall located at the Erie Street Market. There was some interesting things and Cherie bought some lace work which she plans on mounting for display. The woodworking tools were priced high and most were of marginal condition. I did see a copper plate of an Indian that interested me but our budget is real tight after the expense of getting the two computers fixed up before I give them to Denise and Wayne. Right now $28 is more than I wish to spend on myself, especially when it is not a need.

After the antique store we went to Toledo’s “Taste of the Town” event. What we expected was a representation of some of Toledo’s better eating establishments but we were in for a disappointment. It seems that Toledo has gone seriously downhill on it’s downtown events. The “Rally by the River”, which at one time featured nationally known bands, has devolved into a puttering affair with rather small attendances. There is little in the way of promotion here. What we found at the Taste of the Town was a few booths representing no main restaurants and selling things like French fries and sunglasses. A waste of time and money. Cherie and I tried the Thai food at one booth but it was greasy and I thought kind of nasty. Then we had ice cream cones and that was great. “Cherie, how about going to a real restaurant” I suggested and got an immediate “Let’s go” response.

We went to a Mexican restaurant that one of the guys building the customer lounge at Ed Schmidt Chevy was telling me about. It is where the old Timko’s Soup and Such had once been located. It was every bit as good as he had said. In fact, not only did it taste great but there was so much on a plate that I think we will eat for three days on the leftovers. I had two taco’s for lunch I made from the fajita stuff we got from there. I don’t remember clearly but I think we just came home and relaxed for the rest of the night.

Cherie just came home from work so I will go now.

No comments: