Monday, June 19, 2006

TIme to catch up

6/17/06 Saturday

6/19/06 Monday
As you can see I haven’t gotten to this journal for a couple of days. There has been so much that happened. I will have to work to remember the events and the sequence they occurred. I ended Friday with a migraine.

So now to Saturday. The one thing that stands out in my memory the most is going to “Muster on the Maumee” at Fort Miegs. At this moment I am finally downloading the pictures I took while there. I may have memory loss issues but this is one memory that I will not forget.

That took a while. I took 68 pictures there and I had to go through them all. When I have time I will tell you about this day. Here’s one picture of my son Bruce. Got to go take Fred shopping and then Wayne.

So, let me tell you why this was so special. It is the first time I have seen my son since, I don’t know, a year maybe. In a strange way, his going to Iraq has brought us closer than when he was here in Toledo. We didn’t talk in depth just sent stuff back and forth but it was good, it was more than before. But the place and timing made it poignant. This is Saturday and tomorrow is Father’s day. FATHER’s Day, that sounds good as I remember raising Bruce and his younger brother Adam. I was proud when they called me dad. I was happy and I loved them and tried to be a father to them in my limited way.

They were I think three and five years old when I started getting together with their mother. It is a great sadness I carry regarding these two. The turmoil of my relationship with their mother on top of her divorcing their father to be with me was hard on them. I did my best but the slide into madness I went through the two years prior to my accident caused serious rifts in the bitter fight of our divorce. I stopped being involved with them during this and then had the wreck. It was over a year before I made it back to Toledo but wasn’t really able to connect with them because I was pretty dazed and confused at this time from the brain injury.

More coming. I got to go get Wayne right now.

Got to Wayne ok. He did his mid month stock up. “What am I going to do when you’re gone. Who’s going to take me to the store” he worried. I don’t have a good answer for that but I know there is some help somewhere. I just haven’t located it for him yet. Fact is there are many things I have not done. This is a constant frustration, my inability to follow through on things.

I never got the letter to Larry done but Patrick Duffy called me about an hour ago. He said that Larry called him and after they talked Larry agreed to accept $37,000 as a final settlement on the farm. Good news indeed. Finally things will be settled.

I am exhausted and it’s only 5:00. I need to get things done and run out of steam. I think I’ll lay down for a bit.

10:31 – I’m back. Now I’ll return to Fort Miegs. When I had noticed Bruce’s interest in military things I got us involved with reenacting at Fort Miegs. There we joined the “War of 1812” group that was based in Fort Miegs. The Fort had been built for the war so we faithfully worked to be historically accurate. During the events we would often camp out over the weekends and sometimes travel to other commemorations of 1812 battles with our cannon. Loved to fire the cannon.

For Bruce this hobby grew to where he now has uniforms, guns, and equipment that match wars from the revolution to Vietnam. The truck is his. A project he has been restoring for years.

So it was Father’s day (OK the day before), it was at Fort Miegs, Bruce just got back from war, it was a good moment. I sat and listened to Bruce as he would talk nonstop to the many that came to his display. I was waiting for a time to just talk with him but I could see it might take a while. I told Cherie to be patient. It was hot out and there were no clouds to dampen the sunlight.

I learned more about Bruce just listening to him talk with others. He gets animated as he discourses on weapons and many other areas he is knowledgeable about. Bruce is an impressive young man. We finally got a peaceful moment and just covered some general things like his house, mortgage, and we only touched on Iraq.

At Muster there are many weapons discharged as part of the demonstrations constantly being given. These demonstrations include cannons and full auto machine guns. I watched Bruce’s face knot up with each explosion and he told me how it bothered him. He said that it makes him want to reach for a weapon that is not there. I can tell that Bruce saw more action than he ever let on about.

Cherie and I started to walk around and take in some of the many displays of military history that went all the way back to Rome. Unfortunately the heat was too much for Cherie so she went to the entrance building that was air conditioned.

I went back through the fort seeking any I may know from the days I was a reenactor here. I did find two or three. John Maier was someone I had remembered from the fort but I was later surprised to learn he had worked for me a couple of years.

Ray I recognized easily and remembered all kinds of details about him. It is strange what I remember and what I don’t. It’s like when I first woke from the coma. I could remember my home phone number but not my address.

This is all for tonight. I have been getting tired and had a few slow downs. We are excited to hear my brother will sign off on this farm so it can be nailed down.


Bazza said...

Hello Bob. I've been reading your interesting blog and I am impressed with the way that you get on with your life without feeling sorry for yourself(which you are entitled to do.
It's very honest and good to read.
Regards, Barry

Bob said...

Thanks Barry. Feeling sorry for myself is not an option I will allow. My problems stem from the choices I made. You reap what you sow. The events of my past are now lessons for how to choose well in my future.