What is a man?

8/3/09 8/3/09 Monday
It’s 4:24. I’m done for now. Been out working all day and the heat has gotten to me. The bitch of it is that it’s not that hot out, maybe in the low 90’s. At least I think that’s what the weatherman said. But it’s gotten to me. I’ve gotten weak where it was hard to lift my foot to check the boot for mud before I walked in the house. That surprised me. It doesn’t seem like I’ve gotten much at all done. I’ll drink a ton of tea and lay in front of the fan.

As I worked I’ve pondered the words of my brother and written many replies in my head. I’ve debated how to approach him so we can resolve our differences but also thought about the many reasons he has to avoid me, the light I might shine on him, the things I might expose.

But I’m tired and must lay down.

Larry seemed real sensitive about being a man. "Don't you dare question my manhood" he said, perceiving a slight that wasn't there when I said "I'd like to think you're a man that..." So I went online to find some definitions of being a man. Here's one I particularly like and agree with.

Relationship
Men teach and learn from others. Men coach and encourage. Men compliment. Men are peacemakers and negotiators. Men mediate, arbitrate and facilitate. Men comfort and nurture. Men enjoy solitude and companionship. Men are good friends. Men can keep a confidence. Men are faithful, sincere and decent. Men take pride in their achievements. Men try to make their community safe. Men are philanthropic and generous. Men are helpful, kind and thoughtful. Men are compassionate and sympathetic. Men cheer people up when they are down. Men are tender and gentle. Men are loving

Men debate and discuss. Men like fair play. Men like joking with others. Men entertain others. Men protect and rescue others from harm. Men sacrifice themselves for their family. Men sacrifice their lives for the greater good. Men co-operate. Men are good parents. Men lead others. Men are patient. Men are honorable. Men are honest. Men create laws to protect others. Men are tolerant and accepting of others. Men are good listeners. Men counsel. Men work together in a crisis. Men respect themselves and others. Men value all life and appreciate nature

Action
Men are decisive. Men get things done. Men are practical. Men are organizers. Men transform. Men like to fix things. Men motivate and inspire

Expression
Men are exuberant. Men are free-spirited and playful. Men are charismatic. Men like to celebrate. Men are spiritual. Men have deep feelings. Men are open and expressive. Men communicate directly. Men are witty. Men move people with their words. Men are passionate. Men enjoy sex. Men are artistic. Men create and build

Thought
Men question and seek knowledge. Men search for meaning in their lives. Men are resourceful, adaptable and flexible. Men try to create order in a chaotic world. Men are wise and understanding. Men like to know how things work. Men invent and innovate. Men like intellectual games and rules. Men hypothesize and solve problems. Men are analytical and strategic. Men are philosophical. Men are planners and forward thinkers. Men reason logically. Men are smart. Men keep things in perspective. Men hope for a better world

Strength
Men are responsible. Men provide security and stability. Men are self-reliant and independent. Men can endure great pain. Men can restrain themselves. Men are calm in a catastrophe. Men are resilient. Men are dependable and trustworthy. Men are courageous and heroic, Men stand up for what they believe. Men are solid, stoical and firm. Men fight for a good cause. Men are disciplined. Men admit to their mistakes. Men work with danger, dirt and discomfort. Men have stamina, drive and determination. Men focus and concentrate. Men are hard workers. Men use their power for the good of others.

Later I plan to write a short essay on this, to express what I think it means to be a man. Knowing me that might or might not happen. We'll see.