This is where the garden was and will be again when we start renewing the farm. See how the sand has drifted as high as the fence.

1/26/06 Thursday
Doing good this morning. It’s 8:21 and I am already showered and shaved. I’ve been thinking about the book lately and hope to write on it some today. I have also contemplated going to see my old friend Bernie who lived in his art studio across the hall from where my business’s were. Going over there is always painful as I face the world I had created. My offices, my warehouse, and mostly my woodshop. It’s all gone and the remains left by the scavengers, who pick through it still, echo in my mind as they bring the ghosts of my memories to the surface. I will call Bernie and I will go.
I called and left a message on his phone. Hope he returns it. I am always unsure of myself with those who knew me when I slipped into madness. I have written letters of apology and slipped them under doors when I couldn’t hand them personally to those I wish to apologize to.
Wayne called and asked me to call the lawyer and get the ball rolling on his disability claim. I remember telling him I was going to do so weeks or a month ago. I forgot and it was gone. I am sure I would remember to do it and then get distracted so the thought would vanish from my mind. This is a constant problem and is a big part of my disability. Geeze! The disabled helping the disabled, it is the way of things. With Wayne and I it is like the blind leading the blind. We both have serious memory issues. His is from the Multiple Sclerosis and of course mine is the brain injury. I’m not too good at helping but at least I try.

9:13 – I love these moments when the mind is bright and I have energy and motivation. I just washed the dishes and did some dusting. It is Prime time so I must make as much use of it while I can. I’m gonna rush something for breakfast and get writing. First I will write a letter to Norma Schmitz, the woman who helped me so much in St. Louis. Then I need to do the letter to Allen with the hope it will spur him to seek help.
Just fixed eggs and bacon. Now that I’ve eaten I am slowing a little. Wonder if eating affects this by changing the blood flow to the brain. I know that one of the reasons your not supposed to swim after eating is you can get cramps because your blood is directed more to the stomach as it absorbs the nutrients from the food.
Fred just called and would like me to take him to Rite Aid to get his prescription filled. I am doing better but have a headache on the way. I’ll take some aspirin for now with the hope that will work. I really don’t like taking the prescription drugs unless I need to.
I got him to Rite Aid just fine. It was the new store. I can’t remember for sure but I don’t think we have been inside before. It’s laid out well, nice and open with every row labeled well. You could read every isle marker (I don’t know what the hell they’re called) in the store from the door and know right where to go. That’s a man thing, you know, we like go in, get what we want, and get out. None of this shopping through the whole store stuff. All right, I did look around. Just curious you know. “Didn’t shop” just checked a few prices. That’s not shopping, Right??
After that Fred say’s “Let’s go to Crissey road, I haven’t been there in a while, you don’t mind do you”. “Fred not only do I not mind but I like doing this for you” I let him know and we were off.
When Fred said “Crissey road” he was referring to the thrift shop we go to where he picks up free bread for Barb and I get some for Wayne and anyone else I am helping. All they had was hot dog and hamburger buns. Fred fondled them as he asked me what they were. “Their hot dog buns Fred” I told him. He fondled and thought and he fondled and thought then he made out the word potato on the package so he asked “Do you think Barb could use these?”. “Oh yeah Fred, she’d love to get them” I reassured him. He picked out just two packages and I got one for home.
They had some buttermilk so I got a half gallon. Figured there are lots of recipe’s that use buttermilk so I will look them up on the Betty Crocker program that is in the computer Larry gave me. It had belonged to Delmer and Larry said Delmer didn’t like it so gave it to him.
Then Fred went looking through the place, with me following of course, I’m his eyes. There wasn’t anything there he was interested in so he decided to head out. First he wanted to ask if they would take his golf shoes. At the glass counter I looked through the items on display as I always do, looking for hidden treasures. The last time I got the cowboy hat, always find something. What’s that? Oh! Those scissors with the zig zag cut that are used in sewing. Cool!! Does Cherie have some??? “How much are those” I asked. She turned the box over and said “A dollar fifty”. Hey, I don’t care if Cherie has fifty pairs of these you can’t go wrong for a buck fifty. I know she would like the thought if nothing else. “They use those for sewing don’t they?” I asked her and she told me they are called pinking shears so I bought them.


(See the picture? I laid them out for Cherie to see when she gets home. This is the kind of mushy stuff we do)

Done at the thrift shop we headed over to Helen’s. Fred had gotten the envelope back he was bitching about earlier. It didn’t have enough postage on it so he was going to take it straight to her. Fred didn’t want to stay and visit at all so he handed her the envelope said a few words and we left.
The next stop was the bank. Fred wanted to “straighten them out” because I had taken him here to accomplish the small task of having copies of his checks sent to him. It took a while for him to get this done and then we came home where I am writing this. I tried calling Bernie and got his machine again.

Cherie came home and we went to the YMCA for our workout. We worked out together and I really like doing that. Of course I like every moment I spend with her. We started out on the treadmills. Cherie likes them better than the bikes but I have a hard time with the treadmills because of the partial paralysis on my right leg. I think I will stick to the bike. Then we went through the machines together. There were some that Cherie didn’t like because they were painful or something. The one that exercises the back I will have to be careful with cause it still hurts four hours later. Gotta be careful considering I broke this back before.
We whipped through the routine in thirty or so minutes and then came home. Cherie fixed up a meal using the leftover chicken from yesterday. She has turned into quite a cook, of course I must take a little credit for that. I love to cook and she loves to do things for me so it is a good blend.
It’s 10:30 now so I need to wrap this up.