I was asked the other day where the name Bobcarver that I use as my E mail address came from. I'm a woodworker and woodcarver, or at least I was. I still carve but the woodshop was part of the life I destroyed. The box here I made for my father prior to my fall into madness. The heart I carved for my wife for Valentines day 2004.

2/6/06 Monday
It is 3:42 AM. Cherie just got up and is sick. She asked me to get the bucket as she sat on the toilet. Not a good sign. My sinus thing is spreading so we both may be hurting here as days go by. I just got the last two days of journal published.
Now it is 9:12. I have showered and washed most of the dishes despite the pain that comes with that task. It is a bright sunny day outside though it is a bit cool, about 22 degrees this morning. It is to go up to 32 today and it looks like we are in for a week of cold weather. I’m debating going to the gym. Need to have some discipline. Barb called yesterday and asked if I could take her to Trilby church at 1:00 today. She said Fred might want to go. She called me Sunday, asking me to take her to cash a check. I told her no. I would bet that she got it cashed and spent it. Now she will have no food and no money thus talking Fred into going so she can get him to buy food. It is the drug life.
I decided not to go to the gym because I am fairly lucid, running a good eight on the Bob scale. Right now I am researching things like gray water treatment for the farm. I have energy and am getting things done so this is prime time for me and I want to make as much use of it as I can.
I called Eileen. I had put it off because I knew she would be overwhelmed at this time in her life but I couldn’t anymore. She’s a good friend, I believe I wrote before that I consider her to be my best friend, and I just couldn’t quit worrying about her. I tried to call her home phone yesterday and then again today but got no answer. I looked up her cell and called it. “Hello” she answered and I was glad to hear her voice but studied it to feel how she was doing. When you’ve known someone for fourteen years you can almost read their voice like a book. She sounded tired but seemed to brighten a small bit with my call.
“How ya holding up” I asked her. “Oh,,,allright” She told me and let me know she has been keeping busy. She has a mountain of stuff to take care of but I was glad to hear that her kids haven’t left her alone. She said she will return the cable box today. I suppose that means she won’t be able to go online but don’t know for sure. It was good to hear how she was doing.

3:16 – OK, Let’s see if I can recall all of this. I took Fred to Barb’s. He had some of the food he had bought for himself and other stuff for Barb with him. Fred was talkative and then quiet. “You want to buy this car? I’ll sell it to you. Just give me $2500 and take over the payments” he blurted out. This totally caught me off guard so I just thought out loud as I mentally fumbled with this. “Well…I like the car. I’ll have to talk to Cherie though…the $2500 now that would be tough…I meandered. “you like the car don’t you?” Fred said with trepidation. I told him that I would love the car but I would have to talk to Cherie.
It was Barb and Dawn who would be going to get food from Trilby church. They are all using the same address to put them in the area Trilby was responsible for. I don’t care, just happy they can get help. Dawn now has a walker. Her tremors have gotten so bad that she fell down at the Zeph Center.
Barb says the police took Dixie away in a straight jacket. She was laughing as they carried her like a log. Earlier she had called Barb and told her she was hiding in her closet. “Look out your door and tell me if there are people out there trying to get me. I can hear them talking about me” she told Barb. Barb called Dixie’s daughter who called the police. There is no doubt that Dixie is schizophrenic but the doctors won’t diagnose that and only give her anti depressants when she needs psychotropic medication. That is the way it is for the poor. At one time Dixie would have been properly treated or housed in a state mental facility but now the state just shoves them out with out resources they need. Organizations such as the Zeph Center do what they can but are overwhelmed like all the agencies.
Of course Barb’s check was gone as I had suspected but that’s the way it is. Nothing I can do about it. We got to Trilby Church and went in to get their bags. Dawn didn’t want to go down the stairs and I can’t blame her so I went to get her food. Barb lied to the lady when she asked how many were in Dawns family. “Oh! Ooh,,,she has a son with her” Barb said. This gives her a bigger bag of food which is fine but I quit correcting this awhile ago.
Getting them home I helped the girls get their stuff in. Fred looked at Barb and said with a big grin “Bob’s buying this car”. Barb asked him what was he going to do without a car. “Bob’s going to Texas. What are you going to do?” she asked. I told her it would take a year to get there because I have to rebuild the house.
I looked at Fred and said “Well Fred, were out so where would you like to go?”. He just looked off into the air and told me “I don’t care, wherever you want to go”. I was digesting how unlike him this is when he said “We should go to Spring Meadows (the strip mall) and go to the Dollar Tree. Then we can take this car over for Jeff to see it. (Jeff is the only mechanic Fred lets work on his car)


On the way there Fred told me “I’m not doing good. I’ve been depressed. I’ve been thinking allot about my past. I’m having money problems. These credit cards are tearing me up”. This explains allot. He was just telling me he is trying to fill out a form for a Kroger credit card. I think he kept charging everything on the many different credit cards till he couldn’t make the payments. I will ask him about that and see about him consolidating his debts.
It’s late now, at least for me. 8:21. I am tiring out and Cherie is sewing. We wanted to watch “Surface” but all the stations are carrying a fire at an apartment complex not far from here. Goodnight.