Good Morning

3/7/06 Tuesday
Good morning. It is a bright sunny cloudless morning with an outside temperature of 20 degrees. That will rise to the 40’s so about as good as it gets. I had angry dreams again this morning and it took a while to wake up. There is nothing scheduled today, at least not so far, so I will spend some time online researching legal procedures for Eileen to establish her common law status. I also will continue pursuing Wayne’s Social Security disability as well as getting him access to medical help for his Multiple Sclerosis. Perhaps I will carve.

I am not a person who is good at tippy toeing around or not saying what I think. This is frustrating as I continue to watch stupidity being posted on a blog of someone I know. What people are proud of is kind of sad, especially when they post it and say “Hey! Look what I did. My mommy would be proud of me. And I am so happy to be causing more problems”. (I’m speaking metaphorically and I suppose being sarcastic at the same time). I am sure I will hear about this from those who are offended by the truth. It is just sad to see. I had the F’ you attitude for a good part of my life and it only took about fifty years to learn life would have been much better without it.

Nuff said there. Cherie and I are looking forward to Texas but I explained to her that while it will help to not see things that tears her heart out daily, they won’t go away. It will be easier on her in Texas, because she will be able to focus on things other than what’s up here in Toledo. I just know, from a lifetime of experience, that things generally get worse before they get better. We will help as best we can but have been pretty much shunted out of the picture. It hurt Cherie greatly when she got a call to inform her of the death of a friends mom and the caller did not even ask how Cherie was doing. Rejection is a hard thing as is cold indifference.

Fred just called and would like me to take him to the bank so he can straighten up a problem. Then he wants to go to the dollar store and probably a couple of others providing his lungs can hold out. He still won’t carry his oxygen tank. That reminds me. Barb is quitting smoking because she has a lung infection in addition to seeing what smoking did to Fred. That’s real good. I got Wayne to quit but Allen and Eileen haven’t been able to. Eileen has so much stress that quitting would just make worse so I suppose she is better off now smoking.

It’s time to get ready to be his chauffer. Fred kept saying “If you don’t mind” when he asked about me taking him places. To fill new readers in, Fred’s eyesight deteriorated to the point he can’t drive and can’t even see to shop. As a result he lets me use his Cadillac if I drive him around and act as his eyes. I told Fred “Fred, don’t say “If you don’t mind”, you know I don’t and that I am grateful for the use of your car”. Fred said that he just didn’t want to interfere with my plans. That is nice but helping others gives value to my life as well as giving me something to do in spite of my disability.

I just checked my E mail and got some pictures from my son in Iraq. So gotta go.