I wonder

I just posted the previous entry and put a picture of Cherie on it. When I checked how it turned out I clicked on it to make it bigger. I am struck by her face and smile, it is almost ethereal, the level of emotion even her picture evokes. It is good to be in love. Hey, I got it bad and love it. Time to move.

I made it back. This is one of those days when I get lost. I looked all over Kroger trying to find Smart Balance Popcorn Cherie gave me a coupon for. I couldn’t find the popcorn section and then had to peer over a cart a vender had on the way as he stocked shelves. Come to find out Kroger don’t carry that item.

With that done I made it to Kazmier’s. By this time I was moving pretty slow as I was having another of those “Petit” seizures. (I finally found the medical name for them) It took me a long time to find things in this store I seldom go to. Last of all I looked all over for the pop Cherie’s list said was 99 cents. Come to find out they had it up front on the other side of the registers.

I’m glad to be back cause I don’t like being outside when I’m like this. I fixed a grilled ham, cheese, and jalapeño sandwich. I have to get Wayne to the VA clinic today but am slowing more and have a headache on the way. Probably should lay down a bit so I am up to speed for Wayne and then Allen. He’s the real drain for this day.

Cherie just came home for lunch. I could tell she wasn’t to happy and was preoccupied in her mind. I asked her how she’s doing. Cherie said “I’m still angry. What are we going to do if this all falls apart? Where are we going to go?”. Then she started to cry just a little. I told her that no matter what we had each other but that I was going to try hard to get the farm.

I have been wondering. How can we bid on the farm when we just filed bankruptcy and can’t get credit. The inheritance won’t be released till it’s all over so I can’t use it to buy the farm cause I don’t get it till then? I don’t know how this works and find it all confusing. That’s why I must get a lawyer. No one else is explaining anything. If my brother would have bothered to talk with me we could have negotiated everything to make it easier and better for us both. Of course negotiation is not in Larry’s vocabulary. It’s his way, that’s it. When his actions upset my wife that changes things. Then it becomes personal. I can be a real dick if I want to be.

I will lay down now and get about an hours rest before I go pick up Wayne. Hopefully I will clear up some.